Creatives & Imposter Syndrome - Mental Health Awareness Week
Balancing music and imposter syndrome for Mental Health Awareness Week - 15th - 21st of May
I’ve always struggled throughout my life with this inward battle of depression and anxiety spells. They definitely hold a sort of power over me, resulting in quite a few regrets growing up through my teens – but imposter syndrome, a fairly new realisation of mine was definitely intertwined within it all. I’m a massive advocate for mental health / mental illness awareness, so I feel safe enough to express myself with you.
Imposter syndrome can definitely have me in a chokehold at times, especially recently with my music career. I’ve never openly spoken about it, as I thought I was the only one feeling crazy and paranoid about the way I present my image, my sound, my identity. The best way I can describe it, a metaphorical tiny demon in your head that grows the more you listen to it, to the point where you start to believe you are infact that demon, weird right?
I’ve never had the best confidence in the world, it was even hard to find enough courage to start up my account, gigging, showing people my material. The thought of releasing my own work into the world is the most terrifying thought.. but then I started to wonder why? I’m sure a lot of artists can relate when I say that it’s extremely easy to compare yourself, even if you’re not a musician! I bet at least once in your life you have compared the way you look, your lifestyle, your personality, what you have, what you don’t have to someone else. I began to experience that a ton as soon as I launched my Instagram account last October. Not in a bitter way, but in a ‘’I’m never going to be good enough to call myself a musician’’ way.
Self-doubt is another massive indicator of imposter syndrome, and it was only with my career I felt awkward opening up about it, handing out my Instagram account, feeling ashamed as if people would find out I’m not cut out to be calling myself a singer-songwriter. Its easy for me to linger on my own words telling me to quit and give up, but acknowledging that the reasons weren’t factual was the first step in growth.
I learnt to speak out about it, opening up slowly and having conversations with other artists of different ages. The feedback is so eye-opening and refreshing. Not a lot of people openly speak about imposter syndrome, it’s almost as if it’s frowned upon to view yourself in such a way, but I definitely view it as a type of mental illness despite a lot of online disagreement. It is still mind-blowing to me how outwardly a lot of people were messaging me telling me how confident I look when singing and how well put together I seem, just another example of how Instagram is rose-tinted.
For anyone who struggles with any type of mental health illness whether you’re in the music industry like me or just interested in my blog; I’m not going to force you to get help as soon as possible because you are in control of your life. But just know that help is available for you to reach out when you need it and when you feel ready. Sometimes you won’t feel ready, but you deserve love, happiness, peace and calm.
Tabitha x
Some helpful links for anyone out there struggling (UK Based)
The Calm Zone Helpline – 5pm – Midnight
The Mix Helpline – Support Under 25’s – 24/7
https://www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team?gclid=CjwKCAjw36GjBhAkEiwAKwIWyW63L5CHn2Q4p95jy3wnf95T_6WeNWbE4Jhac6e0Lemb566ckqLu_BoCepsQAvD_BwE
Papyrus Helpline – 24/7
https://www.papyrus-uk.org/?gclid=CjwKCAjw36GjBhAkEiwAKwIWyZzklYzyHFBp932-bYF0wxSNMfwJYY6E530sGbvdAeNiKBFt_KCqnhoCzVwQAvD_BwE
SwitchBoard Helpline – LGBTQ+ Friendly – 10am – 10pm
https://switchboard.lgbt/
Amazing post
Great post 🙂